Jake Exton and I were friends, or so I believed. After becoming manager of the pub for the front of house staff shortly after was when things began to become uncomfortable. During the winter months (2019) I was in a relationship at the time, Jake had then begun to share his feelings of interest towards me even though he was also in a relationship. He would often sit at the bar and make me feel uncomfortable on shift discussing matters of how unhappy he was in his relationship and how he wanted to be with me. He would tell regular customers about how he had feelings for me and was going to date me making it more uncomfortable, as then regulars would often ask me about what was going on between Jake and I.
I was aware of the long history Jake had of having sexual relations with staff and it made me very uncomfortable knowing that he was trying to now approach me. Especially while dating a co-worker at the time. I at times was able to separate this in the workplace enabling me to continue to work. Often however I was subjected to sexual comments in the workplace such as “it is not fair for you to be wearing those pants with your ass looking like that” or “I had to make sure I was making eye contact and not staring at your body”. These are just some of the types of language I was subjected to. Due to being in a manager position and with Jakes previous reputation of sexual relations with staff I was then brought into the discussions of outside individuals believing Jake and I has also fallen into this type of relationship in regard to sexual relations. Losing friends over this type of allegations made about me having sexual relations and also not being believed by some was very hard for me during this time.
As time passed on a sense of being comfortable was often displayed by Jake, thus leading him to refer to me as Chewbacca because of my hair, uploading an old embarrassing photo of me on the canoe and paddle website impersonating me (without consent) in a review and often changing my name in the POS system (Chewbacca and now Sunshine and Rainbows). After changing them back to my actual name numerous times, I just eventually accepted Sunshine and Rainbows moving forward. Until recently I had become normalized to this behaviour, being talked to in a certain way, having sexual propositions made towards me, and experiencing verbal harassment in the group chat. As a manager I took my role seriously, I prided myself in doing that job to the best of my ability. I was often left without support and had expectations to carry on that job like anyone should to the standard of which the owners desired. However, after a very stressful time, COVID 19, and not prioritizing my family I decided to step down from the manager position.
Still being subjected to inappropriate behaviour, and often being discussed by Jake with my friends, in regard to how he could become more romantically and sexually involved. I often felt uncomfortable coming into work, not knowing what reaction would occur or what behaviour I would be subjected to. The most recent sexual proposition was about 2 months ago while with my son. Jake and I were friends like I said and becoming so normalized to this behaviour we at times would hang out outside of work, with him moving on to outside parties in regard to personal relationships I believed as though we were past this. However, what I didn’t know was that it was still a goal of Jakes. He just would not take “no” as an answer, after trying to offer to “eat my ass” while my son was in the other room and saying “no” numerous times I was forced to frantically grab my son and leave. It was so uncomfortable; my son was distraught the whole way home and I was in shock. After saying no over and over again, leaving was my only option to ensure this uncomfortable situation was no longer subjected to me.
After this situation occurred going into work was so intimidating for me. Not once was this situation acknowledged or even apologized for. Shortly after Jake moving onto a new employee of interest I felt as though my treatment began to reflect that of targeting. Displayed within the group chat before other employees I was often left attacked and feeling singled out, unappreciated and without a voice. Then forcing me to resign from this place of employment all together.